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Aversive : unpleasant positive punishment. Codependency often involves placing a lower priority on one's own needs, while being excessively preoccupied with the needs of others. Emotional blackmailers use fear, obligation and guilt in their relationships, ensuring that others feel afraid to cross them, obligated to give them their way and swamped by guilt if they resist. Aguirre, Borderline Personality Disorder in Adolescents p. Borderline personality disorder. Views Read Edit View history. Understanding these dynamics is useful to anyone trying to extricate from the controlling behavior of another person, and deal with their own compulsions to do things that are uncomfortable, undesirable, burdensome, or self-sacrificing for others. The problem is often more a matter of how they are going about getting what they want, or that they are insensitive to others' needs in doing so that is troubling—and how others react to all of this.

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